I love my new apartment. I might marry it.

I wish there were someone here with me, though. I miss having other people in the house with me. A sleepover would be perfect right now. We could make popcorn and make stupidly obvious observations and make each other laugh. We could drift into a deep conversation and maybe go with the current or maybe back off. If you were here, I would tell you that I'm full of hope right now, so full it's leaking out of me. I'd just give you a hug of joy because everything is right in my little sphere.

There were fireworks tonight. I've never been all that hot for fireworks, but I do remember the Death Cab concert on the fourth, and also the show over Puget Sound in Port Townsend, and also for Madrid's birthday, and once when there was a viewing party at the Ajirogi's house. I remember setting off fireworks in the street outside our house, especially the little pagoda type and the screaming-spinning ones and I remember Craig in the FLSR who blew off his hand and replaced it with a hook and stayed the happiest person I've ever known and who then drowned.

At the Death Cab concert, I was with another guy who'd recently come out. He wanted to get physical and I wasn't comfortable with that, but we sort of did anyway because Huntington Beach after dark in July is much colder than you would think. It was kind of an awkward night. I had taken the greyhound down there. Just for the weekend, just for that concert, just because I could.

The Puget Sound show was beautiful, but again, the guy I watched it with had a crush I didn't want to requite. I knew to bundle up that time though.

In Madrid, we'd been walking around all day and we were about to take a train back to Alcala de Henares when we heard the booms. We ran for two minutes back through the train station and popped out to a million red and green sparks in the air. Boom. Boomboomboom. BoomboomboomBOOMBOOMBOOMBOOM it was the best show. Like cannonfire. Like we were going to die. My stomach felt sick from the shockwaves. Eventually it ended and we caught the last train of the night.

I miss you.